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My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - Printable Version

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My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - Josh The Biker - 04-01-2013

I want to get him off my lap without hurting him. How would I do this?


RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - Tiger - 04-01-2013

Take a pillow and press it against his head. He'll suffocate soon without any pain. Then you can easily kick him off.


RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - Wooderson - 04-01-2013

Morphine.


RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - Tiger - 04-01-2013

(04-01-2013, 10:34 PM)Wooderson Wrote: Morphine.

Also a good choice.


RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - FlawlessHappiness - 04-01-2013

(04-01-2013, 10:29 PM)Tigerwub Wrote: Take a pillow and
smash
(04-01-2013, 10:29 PM)Tigerwub Wrote: it against his head.

Don't worry. A pillow is soft, everybody knows that.


RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - Ghieri - 04-01-2013

I know this sounds crazy, but have you tried...

Spoiler below!


Picking him up and setting him down?




RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - failedALIAS - 04-01-2013

[b]Aldighieri, you heathen!
[/b]


RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - Nice - 04-01-2013

brush your teeth with a lemon for 1 hour, bite your tongue and sacrifice a kitten. That should do it


RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - failedALIAS - 04-01-2013

Why the fuck is anyone asking us for advice?


RE: My dog is on my lap and I can't get him off - Tiger - 04-01-2013

(04-01-2013, 11:15 PM)Dogfood Wrote: brush your teeth with a lemon for 1 hour, bite your tongue and sacrifice a kitten. into a fresh tube of toothpaste. That should do it

(04-01-2013, 11:16 PM)failedALIAS Wrote: Why the fuck is anyone asking us for advice?

Because we're AdviceAnimals. Literally.