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Pasta
failedALIAS Offline
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Posts: 2,782
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#43
RE: Pasta

(08-30-2012, 12:11 AM)Damascus Rose Wrote: If you are going to critique something at least make sure what you're saying makes a shred of sense. I honestly have no clue what you're trying to say.
What I'm saying is that you're saying you used the space of about three paragraphs for a hallucination! A hallucination that anyone reading might pass off as an actual event within the story, thus confusing and throwing off the reader, as well as breaking any pacing of atmosphere. A story is just like a CS; it has to have proper build up in order to have any affect, even if the story in question is a parody. A parody must then follow the nature of humor and introduce substance in an acceptable format.
OKAY!?
08-30-2012, 11:18 PM
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Messages In This Thread
Pasta - by Froge - 08-27-2012, 03:52 AM
RE: Pasta - by Adny - 08-27-2012, 04:08 AM
RE: Pasta - by Kman - 08-27-2012, 05:46 AM
RE: Pasta - by johnbox - 08-27-2012, 04:15 AM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-27-2012, 04:42 AM
RE: Pasta - by lolmaster - 08-27-2012, 05:50 AM
RE: Pasta - by RawkBandMan - 08-27-2012, 06:04 AM
RE: Pasta - by Tommyboypsp - 08-27-2012, 01:14 PM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-27-2012, 06:24 PM
RE: Pasta - by Robby - 08-27-2012, 06:25 PM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-27-2012, 06:29 PM
RE: Pasta - by Robby - 08-27-2012, 06:37 PM
RE: Pasta - by Zaffre - 08-27-2012, 07:37 PM
RE: Pasta - by Tommyboypsp - 08-27-2012, 07:44 PM
RE: Pasta - by Zaari - 08-27-2012, 11:15 PM
RE: Pasta - by failedALIAS - 08-28-2012, 04:23 AM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-28-2012, 04:58 AM
RE: Pasta - by Froge - 08-28-2012, 05:38 AM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-28-2012, 06:44 AM
RE: Pasta - by Zaffre - 08-28-2012, 07:09 PM
RE: Pasta - by Tommyboypsp - 08-29-2012, 10:09 AM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-29-2012, 07:35 PM
RE: Pasta - by failedALIAS - 08-29-2012, 10:21 PM
RE: Pasta - by failedALIAS - 08-29-2012, 10:28 PM
RE: Pasta - by Ank2503 - 08-29-2012, 01:03 PM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-29-2012, 10:27 PM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-29-2012, 10:34 PM
RE: Pasta - by failedALIAS - 08-29-2012, 10:42 PM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-29-2012, 11:59 PM
RE: Pasta - by failedALIAS - 08-30-2012, 12:06 AM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-30-2012, 12:11 AM
RE: Pasta - by Solitary Walker - 08-30-2012, 05:56 AM
RE: Pasta - by lolmaster - 08-30-2012, 06:04 AM
RE: Pasta - by failedALIAS - 08-30-2012, 11:18 PM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 08-31-2012, 12:14 AM
RE: Pasta - by failedALIAS - 08-31-2012, 12:26 AM
RE: Pasta - by Kman - 08-30-2012, 07:02 AM
RE: Pasta - by Solitary Walker - 09-01-2012, 03:23 AM
RE: Pasta - by Kman - 09-01-2012, 07:58 AM
RE: Pasta - by the dark side - 08-30-2012, 08:55 PM
RE: Pasta - by Melvin - 08-30-2012, 09:16 PM
RE: Pasta - by the dark side - 09-01-2012, 07:30 PM
RE: Pasta - by Kman - 09-01-2012, 08:27 PM
RE: Pasta - by Solitary Walker - 09-01-2012, 10:30 PM
RE: Pasta - by Kman - 09-01-2012, 10:38 PM
RE: Pasta - by the dark side - 09-01-2012, 08:33 PM
RE: Pasta - by Zaffre - 09-01-2012, 09:43 PM
RE: Pasta - by Damascus Rose - 09-01-2012, 09:06 PM
RE: Pasta - by the dark side - 09-01-2012, 09:21 PM
RE: Pasta - by Froge - 09-01-2012, 09:54 PM
RE: Pasta - by Zaffre - 09-01-2012, 10:08 PM
RE: Pasta - by Hardarm - 09-02-2012, 12:13 AM
RE: Pasta - by Froge - 09-01-2012, 10:37 PM
RE: Pasta - by Zaffre - 09-01-2012, 10:49 PM
RE: Pasta - by Kreekakon - 09-02-2012, 11:49 AM
RE: Pasta - by Hardarm - 09-03-2012, 03:20 PM
RE: Pasta - by Kreekakon - 09-03-2012, 03:21 PM



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