[REQUEST] Story Writer

[Leeeyam]

"It was a warm summer's night as OP was typing his need for a story into the Frictional Games forum. It was quiet, too quiet. A faint moaning was heard from his kitchen, and he quickly sprang into action! He removed the emergency chest out of under his bed and pulled out an oil lantern and 5 tinderboxes. He moved closer to his door. Upon grabbing the handle, the door broke into millions of tiny pieces, accompanied by the strange scream of what he could best identify as the iron maiden sound. On the other side of the door stood something quite strange, OP couldn't believe his eyes! It was a small golden statue; on the front was a name engraved: 'Stefano'. He put the small golden statue in his inventory, and continued down stairs into his kitchen.

The house was pitch black. Suddenly, a voice echoed from inside OP's inventory, it was a fake french accent! 'OP u idjit, it wuz barelz! <3', OP ignored the strange talking golden statue, and continued into his kitchen. Upon reaching for the light switch, a naked man appeared out of nowhere, flying 30 mph towards OP's face, genitals first! The same scream the breaking door made accompanied it. It immediately vanished on impact. OP thought to himself: 'Is this real life? or this just a fantasy?'

Once OP used his tinderbox to turn on the kitchen light, OP was greeted with a horrendous sight: A small, dead pig making love to another dead pig. 'Hai guise lol i r snake' said the pig. OP paid it no mind, and continued walking through the kitchen. Without notice, a brute monster from Amnesia appeared 3 feet from OP and instantly killed him. The end."

(If you use that story, you need to credit me.)

^^^^ made me laugh.