Out of the closet

[Froge]

"BURN THE HETEROSEXUAL!" The mob chanted as Dogfood was dragged into the centre of town. There was a giant pole and a pile of dry wood at its base which had been soaked in oil. The mob leader grabbed Dogfood and tied his arms behind his back with a tight piece of rope.

Dogfood's eyes went wide with fear as he saw the cloaked man take out a match.

"REPENT!" The crowd continued to yell while the mob leader pulled back his hood.

"Kman! You won't get away with this!" Dogfood screamed.

"You have sinned," Kman responded condescendingly. "You have committed an unnatural act. It is an abomination."

"It's not unnatural!" Dogfood cried. He tried without success to break free from his restraints. The mob leader lifted him up against the pole and began tying his legs.

"Heterosexuality is a sin," Kman continued. "It is filthy and impure. It spreads the deadliest of diseases: embryonation."

The crowd gasped.

"BURN THE HERETIC! BURN DOWN THE HETEROSEXUAL!"

A flame became lit. Dogfood closed his eyes and waited for the inevitable.

"Any last words?"

"REPENT! REPENT!" The ever-growing cries of the crowd insisted.

He was going to die anyway. There was no reason for him to submit.

"I love women," Dogfood declared as he clenched his teeth. "And sleeping with women is normal. It doesn't hurt anybody. So why do you care so much?"

A slap across the face.

"It is disgusting. You will burn forever," Kman condemned. "Every man knows that sex with a woman is an intolerable act of depravity."

"I HAVE NO REGRETS."

The match fell, and the flames rose immediately. Smoke consumed all of Dogfood's form.

"In the name of THE LORD," Kman began, and all eyes turned towards the great spinning frog head in the sky, "I hereby condemn you to death and eternal suffering!"

The frog head continued spinning, seemingly heedless of the actions of humanity below.

:^)