Bit of Advice Seeking

[Alex Ros]

When I was nearly 15 years younger I thought I'd be a nice one movies director. I have graduated at University of Cinematography in Moscow until I got my directors diploma. And slowly began to work in film industry, rising from the coffee peddler to... to my goal to become a director. But along the way I realized that how I imagined myself is not what I am in fact. I realized that I am not a director at all. It wasn't a momentary discovery. It was a slow falling to nowhere. I'd say it was the most depressive day... month... year in whole life. What the fuck? I do not care who am I in fact! I just really want to become a director some day!!! But I had to realize that I had my "strengths" and "weaknesses". I just had to overstep my own wishes and look objectively at the list of my real talents. And I realized I am fine at writing and editing, no less, but also no more. It was painful I'd confess. Real painful.

Years passed and I can say I am a happy person. I am a copyrighter and scriptwriter at the viral advertising agency for nearly 5 years already. I am in a harmony with myself. Yes, there is subordination and have to listen to directors who work with me, quite a depressive situation as long as I am myself a graduated director. But no. I am fine absolutely. Along those 5 years I tried to "acknowledge my strengths and my weaknesses". Moreover I focused on overcoming my weaknesses. For example I am rather close and uncommunicative person and I am trying (even now, exactly right now while writing all this) to evolve myself. Just trying, there is no winning or loosing. So... So I really hope my own story would help you a bit to find your own way. If not, then I am sorry for time-wasting, sincerely.