Request Looking for a talented writer.

**eagledude4** · 03-25-2013, 06:55 AM

First off, I'd like to give a little background to peak your interest.

So far the premise of my custom story revolves around 2 unnamed characters who are Father and Son. Both suffered the loss of the Mother/Wife and the Father attempts to resurrect her through alchemy/sacrificial methods. There is no direct contact with the father whatsoever (atleast until the end).

The main character is the unnamed Son, and the setting takes place around the late Victorian era somewhere in the United States. (You'r writing should reflect this).

I haven't thought too far into it, and I have already started Level design and scripting. (The characters don't have names because I haven't decided on any, not because I don't want there to be any, to avoid confusion)

If you're interested, please reply with a sample of your writing skill.

**PutraenusAlivius** · 03-25-2013, 01:08 PM

"In [YEAR], a family lives in a harmony. A father, wife and a son. Until the wife was [REASON WHY SHES DEAD]. The family was devastated with the loss of the wife. The Father, however, loved so much that he attempted to resurrect her using sacrifices. Will the son found out?"
It's the best i have. I may write another one Wink

**eagledude4** · 03-25-2013, 08:40 PM

Thanks for your interest JustAnotherPlayer. I thought your "Trailer" was pretty good, however, it sounded too modern and there were a couple of grammar mistakes.

I'd like to see another example if you wouldn't mind. Something that doesn't reveal important plot details like the resurrection, I want the player to find out what the father's been doing throughout the story via gameplay and journal/diary entries.

**zaggnut** · 03-25-2013, 09:06 PM

(03-25-2013, 01:08 PM)JustAnotherPlayer Wrote: "In [YEAR], a family lives in a harmony. A father, wife and a son. Until the wife was [REASON WHY SHES DEAD]. The family was devastated with the loss of the wife. The Father, however, loved so much that he attempted to resurrect her using sacrifices. Will the son found out?"
It's the best i have. I may write another one

you forgot the comma after "wife."

**i3670** · 03-26-2013, 12:11 AM

"In 1452, a family lives in a harmony. A father, wife and a son. Until the wife was hit by a car. The family was devastated with the loss of the wife. The Father, however, loved so much that he attempted to resurrect her using sacrifices. Will the son find out?"

**Kman** · 03-26-2013, 01:03 AM

Um, I'm pretty sure cars didn't exist in 1452

**eagledude4** · 03-26-2013, 04:08 AM

(03-26-2013, 12:11 AM)i3670 Wrote: "In 1452, a family lives in a harmony. A father, wife and a son. Until the wife was hit by a car. The family was devastated with the loss of the wife. The Father, however, loved so much that he attempted to resurrect her using sacrifices. Will the son find out?"

I'd like to see something different from what the first person wrote.
Also, some critique:
1. The timeline is set in the late victorian era, which ranges from mid 1800 - to early 1900.
2. No cars in 1452
3. "loved HER so much" (Same as first person's reply)

**PutraenusAlivius** · 03-26-2013, 06:49 AM

(03-25-2013, 08:40 PM)eagledude4 Wrote: Thanks for your interest JustAnotherPlayer. I thought your "Trailer" was pretty good, however, it sounded too modern and there were a couple of grammar mistakes.

I'd like to see another example if you wouldn't mind. Something that doesn't reveal important plot details like the resurrection, I want the player to find out what the father's been doing throughout the story via gameplay and journal/diary entries.

I won't mind. In fact, i'd be glad!
Anyway, the story.
"In 1856, a family lived in peace and harmony. A father, a wife, and a son. A perfect family. Until the wife is killed [WHY SHES DEAD]. After the accident, the father is lately been seen. Why? And will the son found out?"

Sorry, but i'm not brainstorming now.

**i3670** · 03-26-2013, 09:39 AM

The city is a river of filth and sin. Every street corner, a sanctuary for vile women and fornicators. This city must be purged from these unholy demons of desire and lust, and I will see to it that it happens.

**zaggnut** · 03-26-2013, 08:01 PM

(03-26-2013, 09:39 AM)i3670 Wrote: The city is a river of filth and sin. Every street corner, a sanctuary for vile women and fornicators. This city must be purged from these unholy demons of desire and lust, and I will see to it that it happens.

The city is a river of filth and sin,
washing down its degradation into the foundation of our land.
Every street corner, a sanctuary for vile whores and depraved
fornicators. My own father secludes his shame in this wretched place,
but I see everything. This
city must be purged from these unholy demons of desire and lustrous
ways, and I
will see to it that it happens.