Creepypasta

[Dutton]

Well written, i liked the story and every detail in it, i haven't played penumbra yet, but this freaked my out anyway well done!

[ElusiveTuuka]

I'm not very familiar with creepypasta, but if this is representative of a typical story then I think there are some issues with the format.
The language is very colloquial. Perhaps this is in order to try and present the story as a personal account, however the flow is rather inconsistent and the writing techniques do little to provide atmosphere. Use of imagery techniques such as metaphors and similes are very apt for creating detail and conjuring an appropriate atmospheric tone.
As others have mentioned, '"Hyper-realistic teeth" isn't a very imaginative description.

I haven't mentioned this to sound aloof, just in order to provide some advice. Perhaps look into the works of HP lovecraft, and not just the Cthulu stories. His work includes a lot of palpable imagery and interesting use of language, a good source of inspiration for anyone who wants to write horror.

I think I'm correct in saying that creepy pasta is the origin for a lot of slenderman fiction, which I consider to be pretty dire business. Without wishing to kick up a stink, I think the often touted description of slenderman as a mythos is quite hideously pretentious.
I think that people should be less eager to jump on a bandwagon and instead opt to create something original, rather than contributing to something which is rapidly becoming more diluted and sterile.

[Earthykiller127]

[failedALIAS]

I'm not very familiar with creepypasta, but if this is representative of a typical story then I think there are some issues with the format.
The language is very colloquial. Perhaps this is in order to try and present the story as a personal account, however the flow is rather inconsistent and the writing techniques do little to provide atmosphere. Use of imagery techniques such as metaphors and similes are very apt for creating detail and conjuring an appropriate atmospheric tone.
As others have mentioned, '"Hyper-realistic teeth" isn't a very imaginative description.

I haven't mentioned this to sound aloof, just in order to provide some advice. Perhaps look into the works of HP lovecraft, and not just the Cthulu stories. His work includes a lot of palpable imagery and interesting use of language, a good source of inspiration for anyone who wants to write horror.

I think I'm correct in saying that creepy pasta is the origin for a lot of slenderman fiction, which I consider to be pretty dire business. Without wishing to kick up a stink, I think the often touted description of slenderman as a mythos is quite hideously pretentious.
I think that people should be less eager to jump on a bandwagon and instead opt to create something original, rather than contributing to something which is rapidly becoming more diluted and sterile.

YES YES YES!

[B0X1NG DRAG0N]

I thought that it was real