Fifty Shades of Bacon

**Ghieri** · 09-15-2013, 06:16 PM

(09-15-2013, 06:13 PM)CorinthianMerchant Wrote: The machine impatiently waved it's bean around, waiting anxiously for Oswald to come and...

Play an innocent game of dance dance revolution? : D

**CorinthianMerchant** · 09-15-2013, 06:18 PM

That was what Oswald thought desperatly trying to reduce his fever nightmares of the machine slowly...

**Alardem** · 09-15-2013, 06:22 PM

Doubled over in pain, Mandus retched and vomited out blood!!! The warm, sticky, moist fluid drenched the walls and floors and ceilings and ESPECIALLY his bed.

**Ghieri** · 09-16-2013, 12:36 AM

And thus, the bed weeped like this:

And mandus saw that it was good.

**CorinthianMerchant** · 09-16-2013, 02:39 PM

The sight of the bed turned Oswald off, so he instead went to find his XXL...

**Alardem** · 09-16-2013, 02:47 PM

Spoiler below!

Oswald Mandus waited. The lights above him blinked and sparked out of the air. There were pigs in the Machine. He didn't see them, but had expected them now for years. His warnings to the Proofeser were not listenend to and now it was too late. Far too late for now anyway.

Oswald Mandus was an industrialist for 40 years. When he was young he watched the Aztecs and he said "I want to be on the temples great-uncle" and great-uncle said "No you will be EAT BY PIGS." There was a time when he believed him but as he got oldered he stopped. But now in the underground tunnels of London, he knew there were pigs.

"This is Proofesser" the phonograph crackered. "You must kill the Machine." So Mandus gotted his explosive lantern and lit up the wall. "HE GOING TO EAT US" shouted the Man-Pigs. "I will spark at him" said the Tesla-Pig and he turned invisible.

Mandus lanterned at him and tried to ran away. But then the Machine fell and they were trapped and unable to respawn.

"No! I must eat the Pigs!" he shouted.
The phonograph said "No, Mandus. You are the Pigs."
And then Mandus was bacon.

**FlawlessHappiness** · 09-16-2013, 03:48 PM

Mandus was bacon.
A crispy red bacon, with fat dripping from his curled body.
"Yes", whispered the machine. "We are all bacon in this world. Waiting to be served to the innocent children".
"The... children?" Mandus said.
"Yes... Do you remember your children Mandus? Does a bell ring if i say the names, Edwin and Enoch?"
"My.. children?", Mandus said, still feeling like bacon from the transformation.
"Your children will not be hungry anymore... Not with this piece of lovely, red, crispy, delicous, fat dripping bacon. You will serve them well, Mandus.
And they shall eat. They shall feast on you, until they become..."

**Alardem** · 09-16-2013, 05:39 PM

"...Beautiful, succulent, plump pigs fit for the annual Pork Festival!" The Machine roared, reveling in Mandus' delicious new condition. "At last, my dear father, I shall have my revenge!"

It was at that moment than Mandus remembered he had a pepper shaker in his right hand. He-

**Ghieri** · 09-16-2013, 06:23 PM

Doesn't have hands, as he remembered, because he's a piece of bacon. Must have dropped it or something.

**Alardem** · 09-16-2013, 06:27 PM

(09-16-2013, 06:23 PM)Ye Olde Aldi Wrote: Doesn't have hands, as he remembered, because he's a piece of bacon. Must have dropped it or something.

>Look at self

YOU are a PIECE OF BACON.

>Look around

You are in the belly of the Machine. The flyblown corpse of a Pig-Man lies next to you.

>Use Pig-Man

???

Spoiler below!