(06-16-2013, 10:26 AM)Dogfood Wrote: ohh lighten up Kman, i'm sure there's an old bearded guy somewhere that likes little boys like you 
<Family gets a disturbing number of letters all addressed to you.
<Your parents never let you see them, and seem very distressed by it all.
<Eventually, your family goes under protective service-- moving far away from where you did live.
<One night, a large, hairy man kicks the door down, remarking about how long it took him to find you.
<He begins tormenting your family.
<Tells you you're a wizard.
<All you need to do is get on his magical motorbike, and off you'll be to a land of adventure.
Seems pretty legit to me.