Tell a joke or few!

**i3670** · 08-28-2014, 11:38 AM

Spoiler below!

**Mudbill** · 08-28-2014, 01:26 PM

I'm just gonna, like, post a bunch of pictures/gifs I have lying around. Some of them are kinda offensive. That's why I think they're funny.

(PS: Double posting to counter image limit, sorry)

You better get them all. Enjoy the spoilers.

Spoiler below!

**Streetboat** · 08-28-2014, 07:03 PM

whats the difference between two dicks and a joke?

you look like you can't take a joke

**i3670** · 08-28-2014, 07:21 PM

He: Would you sleep with me for a million dollars?
She: A million bucks? Wow! I guess I would.
He: How about for two dollars?
She:Get lost, buddy! What do you think I am?
He: We've already established that. Now we're just haggling over the price.

A man is dating three women and is trying to decide which to marry. He gives each of them $5,000 to see what they do with the money.
The first has a total makeover. She goes to a fancy salon, gets her hair, nails, and face done, and buys several new outfits. She tells him she has done this to be more attractive to him because she loves him so much.
The second buys the man a number of gifts. She gets him a new set of gold clubs, some accessories for his computer, and some expensive clothes. She tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much.
The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5,000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him she wants to invest in their future because she loves him so much.
Which one does he choose?

Answer:

Spoiler below!