Tell a joke or few!

[Romulator]

Spoiler below!

Martin Scorsese's film "The Wolf of Wall Street" broke a record by using the word "Fuck" or "Fucking" 506 times.

That actually beats a record set by my dad in 2003, trying to put an Ikea chair together.

[Deep One]

"100°C --- dead"

that's bullshit, I enjoyed 105 °C sauna yesterday. Ok I admit, it was a bit too hot

[Red]

No, you're dead, you just didn't know it until now.

[Deep One]

fak u röd

[Red]

Deep one pls.

[The Lynx]

Jo, I got one too. Those who played Mass Effect will get it

Cmdr. Sheppard: EDI, I command you to tell me a joke!

EDI: What do you call Harbringer when he is sad?

Spoiler below!

EDI: The Grim Reaper.

[Macgyverthehero]

I thought of a joke related to movie making techniques:

Why are action scenes in movies these days so shaky?

Spoiler below!

Because Michael J. Fox is behind the camera.

[i3670]

A little old Christian lady comes out onto her front porch every morning and shouts, "Praise the Lord!"
And every morning the atheist next door yells back, "There is no God!"
This goes on for weeks. "Praise the Lord"! yells the lady. "There is no God!" responds the neighbor.
As time goes by, the lady runs into financial difficulties and has trouble buying food. She goes out onto the porch and asks God for help with groceries, then says, "Praise the Lord!"
The next morning when she goes out onto the porch, there are the groceries she asked for. Of course, she shouts, "Praise the Lord!"
The atheist jumps out from behind a bush and says, "Ha! I bought those groceries. There is no God!"
The lady looks at him and smiles. She shouts, "Praise the Lord! Not only did you provide for me, Lord, you made Satan pay for the groceries!"

[Mudbill]

I still laugh at this one

[Radical Batz]

I still laugh at this one

I don't get it

Can Somebody explain this clearly to me cause I suck at jokes